Will I Be Alright?
Romans 5:1-5
by Frank Schaefer

Download the PowerPoint Presentation: Alright

Song Link: I'm Alright FFH ("Trouble may find me, but it's not going to keep me down")
 

At the beginning of a new year, we look ahead to the new possibilities, but we often also start to worry about the dark clouds we perceive in the future. We worry and we ask ourselves, will I be alright?

Just recently I read a Psychology Today article that taught me something new. I didn't realize that a negative outlook on life can be the result of a victim mentality. It was written by a minister/psychologist by the name of Nancy Colier. It was one of those "aha-moments" in my life which helped me to grow spiritually.

As a definition, those with a victim mentality are always being victimized, at least in their own mind. They maintain a consistent victim identity and see life through perpetually victim-tinted glasses.

We all know people who seem to be constantly commenting on some injustice done to them -- how others are denying them what they need, want, and deserve, controlling them against their will, and making them do what they don't want to do. Or how life is against them and the universe is designed to punish them, personally. Perhaps you yourself are someone who experiences life this way.

I used to play pretty regularly with a gentleman who I thought had a pretty good life. He was a physician with his own practice, he had a family, nice house. Outwardly, everything seemed great, but he would always complain and be negative out his life. One time, I remember, he was complaining about how the sky looked so dark in the distance. "I knew it," he said: "the one time I can play tennis this week, and it looks like we're going to be rained out. Why does this always happen to me? Can't I just enjoy this one thing? Is that asking too much?" It never rained during our match!

The truth is that we all get victimized in life. Everyone gets attacked, cheated, abused and harmed during their life -- if not physically, then emotionally. And everyone gets harmed by unpleasant events. We're all victims at times to life's challenges and difficulties. It's so easy to be enticed into victim thinking, and can be very helpful to identify that kind of thinking.

One Scripture verse that is helpful here is found in Romans 5:1-6:

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Interesting that in this passage, Paul mentions three prominent attributes he also mentions in 1Cor 13:13 : Faith, love and hope. So let's talk about how love and hope can help us overcome victim mentality to say: I'm going to be alright!

1. Love - The Universe is not aligned against you; you are loved by God

There are certain feelings that come with the perception of being powerless. One of those is that God or the Universe is aligned against you, or punishing you. Paul makes it very clear that you are loved by God, unconditionally. And that in and of itself is a game changer. God is telling you: I think of you as my child I delight in. Now think about how good human parents view their child: They tell their children regularly: I love you so much. I adore you. I think the world of you, you are pretty awesome and you can do anything that you want to do!" And this is how God, who is a perfect parent thinks of you.

2. Hope--You are not Powerless; Hope in God can give you wings

Hope in and of itself is a powerful attribute. People have endured and achieved incredible things based on their hope. This hope Paul talks about is not just grasping at straws, this hope is rooted in our past experience with God. It's not an unrealistic hope. It's a hope that rooted in the knowledge and experience of suffering. Yes, he's saying: suffering is real, it happens to me and to you, God allows it. But think about how it has refined our character in the past, how it made us stronger persons, how it challenged us to grow.

In contrast, Nancy Colier says: "When you're blaming the universe and life for your suffering, you're not actually attending to your suffering or helping yourself feel better. By claiming the victim role, you are intensifying your pain. With victim identity in play, you're not only suffering because of whatever happened, you've now added to that suffering the fact that you don't get what others get, because you're cursed, life and everyone in it is out to get you, and basically the universe hates you." [1]

Paul proposes that we look at the opportunities in suffering and in adverse circumstances. He's turning our feelings of powerlessness around into strength to endure and to overcome. As believers, we are overcomers, not victims. No matter what may come our way, it's not going to keep us down, in fact, Paul says: we will grow from this experience, we will be refined! So, even if trouble may find us, we're going to be alright. Trouble is not going to keep us down! You and I...we're not victims; we're going to be alright, thank God! Amen.

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[1] Are You Ready to Stop Feeling Like a Victim? Rev. Nancy Colier, Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/inviting-monkey-tea/201801/are-you-ready-stop-feeling-victim